Delivered to the Scribe

I am not sure what has come over me. I have grown very careful with myself and as much as I love Max it just seems that I am so tired inside and can no longer bare having to deal with the constant rejection. For the last hands I was perfectly happy being alone and checking in with Aris. I just seemed to need that time to ignore everything and just function. I find it amusing that on the same day I said that I was ready to think about what would happen to me.. I saw the scribe amongst the rest.. he just sitting there quietly but what a presence he had and he... got a woman who is working hard to protect herself to open up and even ask him to take her. Perhaps it is time and perhaps I am ready.

Aris met with Lucian and the business transaction was made between them. I will be with Lucian doing office work for a hand, while he is away the following hand he has the option to keep me there working until his return. I imagine it would depend on the workload and if Aris likes me not being there.. Aris.. I found it hard to part with him yesterday, I have been under his care for years now and it is he that at least was a constant. I must confess that I miss him a bit more than I thought I would and I hope he is doing well without me.... I wonder if he feels the same.

I am a slave.. a very bold slave and never have I had pause to think about my behavior to a man until now.. Perhaps I want to please him more and with he being a Scribe, I feel like I should be less the slave that I am?... He is a man.. a Gorean man and there should be nothing about my behavior that changes but I find myself wanting him to want me nearby so I tread carefully until I know him better. I wonder if this means that I will writhe beneath him better than most.... He intrigues me so and well.. he attracts me. I organized the work today and started to sort and file things from the desk but many times I found myself drifting into thought and thinking about him.. that hold of my hand from the first night with him, the way he looked at it, then rested it back to his chest, his over mine possessively. He is so different from Max. He excites me. I hope he likes having me around....