Coddled Slave of Maximus

I had a day today like I have never had with the man Maximus Cabot. I found him on the deck and I went to him as a slave would go to her Master.. to a kneel there pretty as could be and he greeted me like normal. Soon I found myself with a rope tied around my waist and his men carrying me to the railing and throwing me overboard. It was a terrifying fall and I plunged into the cold water without having gotten a good breath but that did not matter because then I was yanked up so quickly any air in me rushed out and I found myself hanging over the water, flailing and crying, screaming my lungs out. The laughter topside was quite effective in reminding me that I am no longer the Lady Bela, that I am just a slut on the ship, an owned slut. I was left to dangle there for a time, let to drop a bit again to scare me then hoisted up onto the ship rather abruptly to fall to the deck sobbing and coughing, just a puddle of water and tears to the crewmen kicking at me and the final cruel slap on my ass when Max was in my sights and I was crawling to him for safety. I have bruises all over from the rope and the fall, the kicks and landing on the deck.

My Master, the man who would always scoop me up and let me cling to him in times of trouble looked at me differently now and as he came down to a crouch next to my wilted form on the deck, he grasped my hair and lifted me to my knees to look into my eyes. Instead of drawing me in he said -- "remember this day, bela" -- He left me there then and went to sit with the rope he had been working on earlier. I thought to be defiant and let him sit there alone but it was me in a groveling crawl to his feet, my cheek to his foot as I looked up to him. At that moment, I have never been happier to be back in collar, I have never been happier to crawl across a space to get to him. He smiled as he looked at me and touched my hair before giving me a message for Aris, Master intends to meet Aris in the sands by sword.

Pulled up by my hair, my Master kissed me brutally and totally leaving me gasping for breath, writhing and helpless, there is something new about the man of my heart, Maximus. That kiss was not possession, it was being loved.. being -owned-, he left me flushed and with toes curled as something new has happened between us. Nothing was said, I just looked at him and his hazel gaze bore into me, my Master touched my soul and He knew this.

Today ... Maximus Cabot was... my... Master.

Midnight Roamings

I managed to beg Aris out for a walk last night. I was restless and wanted to roam a bit. Aris I think sometimes gets bored with his job and perhaps that was why we had our walk. Many times I am told no and very often he keeps me kneeling at his feet while he drinks paga, he just stares at me. He does not say what he is thinking but I find myself moving into a stunning kneel yet I seem to leave him unaffected. He does not look at me or touch me like he does the slave, Ivy. Master asked if I was jealous of this and I insist ... not.

He led me to the cliffs this time, a different trail, a different route to get there and it was hard at times to keep up with his quick and long gait but I managed not to get lost. A voice was heard calling out to Aris and I just cringed hearing the voice of Marcus, my old Master. He did not seem overjoyed to see me and when he called me a liar I spoke up to defend myself, what I got for it was a slap across my face and ordered to shut up until spoken to. I was then put into service to get them drinks with no coin, earning those drinks. I assure you it was quick and efficient, done in the laziest way possible because it was for water and paga filled to a flask already in my possession. Soon they had their drinks and Marcus had me strip of silks and belly chain, pointed out how coddled I was and let me grovel at his feet, a slave to a Master.

I can not say what it is about Marcus. Perhaps I like to be reminded just how much a slave I am and to be put there relentlessly to stay, I have forgotten over the years just where my place is. Marcus said I will be allowed at his feet but that for now he was done with me and I was to run home to my lover, that my Master had much to think about.. Aris and he seem to get along well, Marcus offered Aris a job should he ever want one.

I was led home and it was quite late, little did I know that Max had been there to find me not warming his furs as he had expressly left as instructions to me.

Fiesty Larl

I ran to the deck to find my Master there, so happy to see him but I could as well see the look on his face when he saw my bruised and battered state. He had spent some time with his newborn daughter, Madeline, then inquired on the condition of his slave, Bela. I explained the fights with the slave, Ivy, and Maximus was not pleased especially since during the first fight I was pregnant yet and he questioned me to see if this short sightedness on my part brought on the birth. I explained to him that I had not been feeling well the days prior and that Madeline was impatient, coming into this world on her own.

He looked me over and as we went over some things on his mind it was fairly soon that he had me bent over a crate putting me through my paces. Having been his slave, then freed to be his Companion and now willingly back at his feet in his collar, I have to admit I am much happier. There is such a difference between loving a man as a free woman compared to a slave. When I was Free, I told him I loved him and I always meant it. But as a slave I must be love, not just say it. My body to his is the culmination of that love. There is no doubt that I am the love slave of Maximus Cabot and I have had the honor to bring him his son and daughters. But now I am back where I belong, where I can show him my intense and deep love where he will always see it and be able to touch it. He had me in such a way that the entire crew knew what was going on and perhaps a few of them had to rush off to the nearby paga den to rape a wench as well. I know I was quite vocal and helpless as my Master kept me in His service for quite a while.

Tenderness shared.. words that are mine forever and between us, I am the woman of Maximus Cabot, in freedom or the truest freedom, slavery. I was given a gift, a golden belly chain which he has said he desires to see it move on my hips when I dance for him. I look forward to this. Master sent me to the Physician for a dose of slave wine and this was done before going to bathe and keeping his bunk warm for his return. He expects me there hot and ready for him..

Today for two reasons he called me His... fiesty larl.

The Door Ajar

I awoke with a suddenness and bolted upright with heavy breaths. My heart was pounding in my chest and I had to stop and try to think what was happening to me. Was it Madeline crying that woke me up? As I listened I heard nothing but silence. In the distance the normal sounds of the crewmen working, I, however, was aggitated and could not touch upon the restlessness. My soul felt touched and it has brought me to an emotional mess because inside is that woman, Max's woman, who aches in his absense. When I looked I saw that the door was a bit ajar and bound out of the bunk to run topside. Aris was seen and as I approached him, he could see that I upset by something, I could not even tell him what until he told me that Maximus had been here. I began to weep and was so angry at him for not waking me to see the man I need so desperately! Aris stood there cooly and I hated him and wished he would go away, I turned to flee from him and back into the cabin. It was here I sat with this journal agonizing over how to write about so many different sides of pain that I feel.

My greatest pain is my smugness in thinking he would not see me bruised and scratched... I am not beautiful to look upon, my Masters gaze would have met with the ugliness of his slave. Marks there not put there by him but a result of a fight of vanity between one slave and another. Wasn't I so jovial thinking what trouble Ivy might find with Marcus when I had the distance of my Master for protection.

*Just then Aris came and told Bela that Max was on deck waiting for her...the book left where it was, Bela rushing to the deck to get to her Master*

The Vine ~ Part Two

Today I ventured out to the falls and while serving a blind man a drink of water I felt to my thigh a stone that was thrown, luckily my serve was not severely interupted but it began a decline in behavior by both the slave called Ivy and myself. We fought like jealous beasts and while we both lacked self control it was plain to see that we are such different creatures. I see in her a slave that I was becoming and have lost touch with and her Master is the reason for that. She see's me as the woman who was cast away by him when in fact that was not the case. Maximus is the reason I am not with Marcus. It came to fighting, bruises and bleeding but a grudging truce and maybe a bit of respect between slaves. I know I hit low on the slave the last time calling her to task about whom Marcus has said that he loved and this time she became the slave who trod in an area that was not her place. Submitting and leaving my children behind will be my regret. I am a woman who found that with a past of Port Karian slave pens and once a true hot whore .. somewhere in that woman was born a woman who would be a wonderful Mother. My children have been my saving grace, that slave marred that today by speaking out on things she could not possibly know. She caused me a great pain that I will not let her find again.

When I got back to where we are staying, my scratches were tended and I bathed myself of the dirt from our fighting. I am bruised and battered and one perfect thing to finish my day... I know Marcus will not be pleased about Ivy's condition and Max... he travels, what will he ever know. The remainder of the day was spent doting on three children much loved. Then I had the privilege of having my Masters bed to myself... such a privilege when it remains empty save.. me.

She is called Madeline

The ships physician examined me after Aris saw that I really was not feeling well after our trip to the springs. Perhaps the emotional outburst and the ensuing fight between me and that slave brought on the labor or perhaps it was just bad timing. After the intitial examination, it was determined that I was in fact in labor and Aris unlocked the collar around my throat.

The long ahns of labor were of me watching the door as the hunt for Maximus began so that he could be there for the birth of his child. Again I brought into this world his child alone, yet she is so beautiful that I try not to dwell on the sadness. He and I have lost so much of our lives together. Aris stood by and watched me in the agony and joy of birth laced with such unhappiness. What is to become of my child now that I can no longer protect it within my body. What will I be now that my last hold to freedom is gone. It is so very hard on me to let go of my children, they have been what has kept me going while feeling so useless for so very long. Again I am faced with the endless days of loneliness. I am in such pain.

Max I know is on a trip of importance..

His daughter that looks so much like Maxine, she has been named, Madeline

Tangling with a Vine

Aris took me out to the springs today and now I am a bit battered, have some bleeding scratches and Aris is in a foul mood. He has his nerve being angry at me, did I not endure him groping that wench in front of me. Did I not have to suffer through the cruel things she said to me about Marcus? I will admit to getting down and dirty with her, I did say some cruel things to her which is what spurred her to attack me but I was glad she did as I wanted to inflict my own pain on her.

As much as I love Max, to touch upon my slavery again then left to not experience it is rather disheartening. Aris see's I wait for him again and what choices do I have now as a slave and not a free woman. The child stirs and is restless and it will be anytime soon that it will demand to be part of our life. Since the fight with the slave I have not been feeling that well.

She has forced me to see that I have quickly lost what Marcus was teaching me, that the slave he was pulling out of me to be seen again has quickly taken cover and closed the door. I hated her today for being so slave like and smug about it. Too, I admired her for it and will hardly let her know this, it will only swell her head beyond reason.

Today.. she made me miss the things that Marcus made me feel. I know I have missed him on and off but I have tried to put my focus where my life is. Things are not turning out as I hoped but that seems to be the direction of my life..

His Door Ajar

After my fun on the deck, I was given my afternoon meal. It was a bit more than I am used to but the baby seems to be consuming much of my energy. I am very excited about the coming birth, the prospect of being with Max for one of our children means the world to me. I am rather unsure to my future with them and looking forward to our reunion with Maxine and Maximus. Aris took me to the gardens the other day and said that Jediah would have them there by tomorrow. I can not wait to see them and I am sure Max is ready to gaze upon his children too.

As I passed his door I saw it open, he had to know I would creep in. There resting on the bunk he looked so beautiful to me, he always has. I stood beside him for a time, my fingers touching at his temple and lightly through his hair. There is no one more important in this world to me. I joined him in that bunk, curled up to him and while I thought I would watch him sleep, it was me who promptly fell asleep. I am home.

When I awoke it was to the gaze of my Master and the test of his lips that would not let me kiss him, there is not way to count all of the times he has done that to me yet I still beg that kiss with a hunger. He asked if I hungered for that sailors kiss on the deck that day.. it seems my Master is keeping close tabs on me. I explained that it was just a flirt, that it is He that speaks to my heart, speaks my soul and my sex, but he knows this. Still.. he teased me with that kiss and got me squirming and begging for his rape. I was sent off to cook for He and the crew. He is such a beast!

He felt his child move today... he smiled at me and looked at me with that love I know is always there. I asked him if he can accept me as I am.. I do not think he likes me where other men can see and desire me. I teased him that he kept me in robes all of those years so that no man could lay eyes on me.. he agreed with me. I knew this.. it is he that I want happy and he will do with me what he needs to make it so.

On The Deck

So begans my new life within my new life. I don’t know where I will end up in any given day and it a certainty that I never expected to be a possession, either Companion or slave, to Maximus Cabot ever again. The anger of Max is brewing and it can be seen under the surface of his skin. I have a long way to go before he looks at me without some sort of doubt, hate or anger. Though I have taken the step to fix my life, perhaps Max will hate me for this forever. I am a mix of feelings and most likely the pregnancy is not helping with the swing of emotions depending on the hour of the day. In an odd way I miss Marcus, he after all was in the process of pulling me from my hidden place and I hope Max will continue the work begun on me. Bela wants out in the sunlight, not locked away in a dark musty place.

Beneath the tunic I have begun to show and now Max has me wearing silks once more. my lower belly is beginning to round, soon I will be more clumsy than I am already feeling yet now the coming of the child is no longer stressful like it was. I was worried about a happy birth for the child and brought to be with Maxine and Maximus. That burden now lifted and the birth not a dreaded thing, without Max it would have been the worst of experiences. I will still lose my child, I am a slave now but not in such a cold yet necessary way. Marcus could not let me keep the child obviously.

How different the two men are. I have been owned by many but only two haved affected my life and in such opposite ways. Max I love with every part of my being and Marcus held love from me long ago in that caravan but it was one to a man so grateful for making me be a slave. By the time I had ended at his feet I had already lived as a love slave twice past, a coddled slave and one that could rule men so easily. He had been the stop for a while in that behavior. I knew very well that if I could find weakness in a man I would use it to my gain. Marcus did not allow that and so he began to shape a slave as she should be so yes, I loved him back then for making me what I needed to be. Max held my heart, he had for so many years and that was no secret but now we form a new relationship and I look towards it with anticipation and apprehension. I do not want to lose that bela I had begun to find again. Obviously I will have to be patient and wait for the birth of our child.

Max put me in silks, placed his collar on me and reserved me for himself, and in the time spent with him there was a calmness in me and I wonder if he could see that I am more at peace? Tripping all over myself as a free woman, trying to figure out what he desired of me was exhausting. Now I am something I know and was comfortable in once upon a time, I hope he could deal with me that way after having me at his side for so long. We are strained, finding our way, there are so many things to learn about each other again.

In the mornings when I rise I head out to the deck of the ship and stand there feeling as if I am so entirely free, I am finally, free of the restraints that held me back and this morning I laughed and danced around the deck just amazing the crew there. A bold woman I was and would flaunt myself at them, turning and spinning, giving them a taste of a Bela in a better form, out of practice for so many years and pregnant. I however moved in a way that lured their gaze and their lust. One sailor grabbed and kissed me while his superior stopped him, I am Max’s was the announcement made to the men, I just winked at the kisser and trotted away to continue my spirals and seductive movements. This crew might learn to hate me for being brash and beautiful, teasing and seductive and so untouchable! And too what a shock it was seeing the Lady Bela of the Estate as such a teasing slut, yes, perhaps they can see that I might writhe well beneath a man and it seems some thing that is the perfect place for me to be. That Port Karian wench was reborn and wobbly on her feet but she will come into her own once again. I am free, more free than any free woman on this planet, how stupid they are thinking they are Free! I have made my presence known on the ship.. I think there will be many slaves sought out at the paga dens where we are to shore.

My Life Defined

On the ship today I was put in Max's collar and am now dressed in silks. I answered his questions with honesty and I see an anger seething under the surface of his skin. I betrayed him by leaving him as I did and I am certain that I will pay for that for some time to come. Left to my throat are the finger marks where he held me there, it would have been very easy for him to kill me and I in turn made it easy for him. If I were to die by his hand tonight I at least would have had his face in my mind at the last moments of my life. Something stopped him. I was given a mercy this time. I am allowed my journal and I am to keep it in his room so he may read it, I am reserved and may go out with Aris. I worry for Aris, I am not so sure Max is done with him yet. Aris did nothing but what I hired him to do or asked of him. I know Aris has feelings for me, I hope Max will be kind.

He looked at my body, bruised by the slave whip that Marcus used well upon me, he touched our child. I know he is not happy about this right now, I could see it in his eyes. However, he is guarded and does not speak things to me right now, his hard kiss told me all I needed to know as he laid me down to rest while he went outside.

It will be hard for a while ~ we will be okay.

Then There Was Maximus

Sitting in the garden with Aris, suddenly there was a scruffy looking man but I would know my Max anywhere. My heartbeat quickened and after I was called to serve another man and released, he patted the ground and called me by my name. Without thought I rushed to him and kneeling there beside him, in this moment, there has never been a better moment ever.

He pulled me to his lap and my lips were to his neck, all I could do was tell him how much I loved him.. simply I said... "I love you so much".. I think this surprised him but he gathered me close to him. I felt his hand on my belly and rejoice filled my heart.. this child he touched within my womb. He was quiet about it but he was told what happened and he knows that it is his.. it could be no one elses. Maximus said we would not be parted again unless by death. I am very aware that he could have killed me and I am surprised that he did not.

We have much to figure out and set sail on a ship where none could touch us, I will enjoy this time with him .. once the seasickness passe

The Hunter

I have been hoping to not serve other men and haved dreaded the day that it will come. If Marcus is still the same as when he owned me many years ago, I will do so. Serving him is one thing, I have placed myself at his feet in search of the Bela that he knew. Though wanting to be sheltered from the rest is my design as so much of myself is kept closed up for Max.

The Hunter demanded that I dance the other night. It has been so long and I barely remember what it is to be a slave yet he said I would do so, he was not looking for perfection but he was looking for heart in what I did and entertainment. A spear thrust into the ground and my ankle attached to it by long leather tether, I danced for this man the relationship of me and Max to me and Marcus. He saw there a pour out of emotion in the movement of a slave body. He was pleased.

I saw him last night before I served my Master. I found I craved this Hunters touch and responded to him entirely too well when all he did was touch my face and trace my lips with his thumb. I kissed his hand and eased closer for more and there inside was heat.

I hope to be able to serve him again...